|
"ARE YOU SETTING YOUR CHILD UP FOR FAILURE?"
By Leigh Butler
Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not depart from it.
Proverbs 22:6
No matter what the age of your child, as a parent, you should be preparing him for his future. By preparing him
for his future, I mean instilling the values and behaviors in him that will ensure his success as an adult. If you
are not doing this you are setting your child up for failure.
AGENTS OF SOCIALIZATION
The family is a child's primary agent of socialization, especially in the early years before the child enters
school. Upon entering school a child is immersed in his peer culture. He spends the majority of the day with his
peers who become very important agents of socialization from this point forward.
As a child grows older the peer culture becomes more important and is a more influential part of his life. The
family continues to be the primary agent of socialization. However, the values, behaviors, and expectations of the
family have to compete with other agents of socialization, especially peers, as a child matures. Other agents of
socialization include but are not limited to school, church, and the media.
UNDESIRED BEHAVIOR
Parents often wonder why their child exhibits undesired behavior. Behavior is learned. If a child is exhibiting
undesired behavior he learned it from an agent of socialization.
What if a child exhibits an undesired behavior that is contrary to the values and behaviors the parents have
instilled?
We all would like to think that once we have instilled a value or behavior in our child, it is there for eternity,
and we don't have to worry about it ever again. However, this is not a perfect world.
Throughout childhood you will have to positively reinforce values and behaviors that are in line with what you have
instilled and negatively reinforce values and behaviors that are not in line with what your have instilled. When
you use positive reinforcement you are strengthening what
you have already taught. When you use negative reinforcement you are extinguishing undesired behaviors
that have been learned from other agents.
The values and behaviors you have taught your child will be in competition with those of other agents if the other
agents do not share the same values and behaviors as your family. Sometimes your child may learn and exhibit these
alternative values and behaviors. That is why positive and negative reinforcement is necessary.
When a child becomes an adult he exhibits those values and behaviors learned during childhood. If your child does not
have an arsenal of values and behaviors instilled in him that is conducive to success then one of two things usually
happens.
First, he may experience an unstable adulthood. In this scenario, life experiences become his teacher. He learns
proper values and behaviors from trial and error where the result he gets from life itself becomes a positive or
negative reinforcer. He may or may not reach the point
where he becomes successful.
Or, second, he becomes an all out failure. In this scenario, he accepts being a failure as way of life. He
sees that he does not have the proper arsenal of values and behaviors for success and makes no attempt to acquire them.
Lifetime failure becomes both inevitable and inescapable.
So, how do you ensure your child's success as an adult? You follow Proverbs 22:6 which says, "Train up a child in
the way he should go and when he is old he will not depart from it."
Instill in your child the values and behaviors you know he will need in the future. Then you can rest - assured that
although your child is influenced by other agents, and may depart from what you have taught him at some point,
ultimately he will return to that which was first instilled in him.
-----------------------------------------------------------
Is Your Child Having Trouble Learning? Education Aids has best-of-the breed products for quick and easy learning.Education - the greatest gift you can give a child.http://www.educationaids.com/mastermind4.htm
Subscribe to Leigh's Lifelong Learning Newleter at
http://www.educationaids.com/lifelong_learning.htm
Lifelong Learning
Empower yourself, develop your potential, and
acquire a new passion for living and learning. Subscribe to Leigh's
Lifelong Learning Newsletter:
mail to:
Lifelong_Learning-subscribe@topica.com
If you would like to publish this article
in your own newsletter or ezine and/or on your web site send a blank message
to settingyourchildup@informationbyemail.com.
Please do not remove
the bio section.
|
|
Featured Product
Mega
Speed Reading
Howard Berg's Mega
Speed Reading empowers you with tools that can permanently change your
life. In just a few short hours with Howard Berg you will dramatically
increase your reading speed, giving you a sharp competitive edge in your
information-laden environment. You'll stay on top of information others
just can't keep up with.
Ask Leigh?
Do
you have questions about, teaching, learning, knowledge, or personal
growth & development? Ask
Leigh? Questions and answers will be published in our weekly newsletter.
Lifelong Learning Ezine
Join the Lifelong Learning community as we inform and
motivate you. Our ezine includes featured articles on topics such as
teaching, learning, knowledge, personal growth & development. Click
here to subscribe
We
will not disclose your email address or personal information to any third
party.
Get your FREE EducationAids.com
email here!
|
EducationAids.com